Friday, March 18, 2011

What Would They Think?

My life is a constant stream of run, run, run. Eight months ago I got a job at a Pizza Place, and a month and a half ago my softball season started. I wake up at 6:45, school until 3:32, practice until 6:15, work from 6:45 to 10:30, and start all over again the next day. (My priorities follow in that order as well.) Throughout the constant interaction with dozens of different individuals, sometimes I find that I'm losing a little bit of myself.. I've always been the girl people can turn to. I've always been the one everyone counts on to get the job done. I've usually been strong in my faith. Last night, on probably my four hundredth delivery, I passed an overturned car on the side of the road being helped by paramedics. The girl seemed fine, as she was sitting on the back of the ambulance, but in my mind I was thinking, what would people have said if she didn't make it? So that started an entire new stream of thoughts on if that were to ever happen to me. I'm on the road a lot, and always seem to be in the middle of a dangerous situation. So I started thinking of the person I am. While thinking, I glanced to my rear view mirror. Dangling from the stem was a orange and black graduation tassel, my pizza place visor "required" at work, a family heirloom necklace I just hung on there one day, and snapped to that a giant, hair-piece, flower I wear to school sometimes. I then began looking around at the contents of my car. A bunch of empty sonic cups I've been meaning to throw away, a pair of green, high heels I wore to church the previous day, and my workout uniform for softball. If my car was overturned in a ditch, what would they say about me? That I was dedicated to my school and family? I had a job I could rely on? That I'm a fun loving person? I'm lazy? That I was an athlete? I'll never truly know what people judge me by, or what kind of person they believe me to be, but judging from the contents of my car, I guess I'm not too awful. :)   


  1. Great post. The eerie thing about car crashes to me, as I've been in a few and come upon a few, is the way the car radio is still playing once everything else has stopped. Stuff from the car is thrown around inside the car and out of the car. Broken glass, mangled metal...but yet, the radio still plays and you wonder if the song playing was the last thing the passengers ever heard.

    And judging by your writing, since we're judging strangers ;-), I'd say you're "not too awful" as well.

  2. Well thank you OJD, and I've never thought about the radio, it's kind of weird to think about stuff like that. Things like this assure me I was not born to be a paramedic or Firefighter. I truely appreciate those who are.