She's Not Very Happy.

I went to sleep last night with a thought in my head, "am I doing what I really want. Am I happy?"
I've taught myself for years that happiness is a state of mind. That you control what effects your moods.
This is true to an extent.
You know that little voice inside your head that always jumps to conclusions? When you burst into tears when your car wont start, or your trying to find ways to pay for your first ticket? Once you stop the gasping breaths and blow your nose, don't you gain some reason?
I've been trying lately to teach myself to listen to the quieter voice. When I asked this question to myself last night, all these excuses and complaints rushed through my head in a fury of confusion and unanswered questions, blocking all thought processes. After laying there for a few minutes, the quieter voice begins to reason.
Now this might sound a little crazy, but bear with me. Once I started to work things out, my problems didn't seem so bad. Yeah maybe I got a ticket, and the car is trashed, but there is always a solution.
So today as I walked around the big ol school of learning, I watched people. Just by a way a person was standing, sitting, or walking, I could tell how they were feeling. One female was sitting distant from the others, with a look of complete concentration on her face. Moments later, she recieved a phone call where she burst into tears.
So I started checking myself, and seeing what habits I had formed that gave clue to my personal character. I held my head a little higher, and I smiled a little more. Low and behold a young lady from work mentioned that I looked happier. Is that all it really took? Yeah I learned to fake happiness with the best of them, but have I really gotten that transparent? I remember in high school when I was Miss. Optimistic. Not too long ago but it's been a while. It's funny what a little reality check can do to a worn out soul. But I'm back in check now, and the goals have been reinstated.
My goal for this week is to pay more attention to myself, and to do things that make me happy. Such as go home this weekend for my mother's 40 birthday ;) I'm also bringing back the HS goal of making at least one person smile everyday. We'll see how it goes.
Meanwhile, pay attention to that little voice and keep an eye on yourself.
Y"all be safe and Have a great weekend :)

Reality

I'm living in a new world of realized reality, and it's not even the real world yet. This college thing is pretty tough if you ask me. Homework every hour I'm not in class, work every hour I'm not doing homework, and then the little things always set in. My car is acting up, they can't find my paycheck, tests are around the corner, bills are fast approaching and I really miss my family. It's like life in fast motion. Everything takes two or three days to process here. It's fighting a losing battle that I have to fight. I know that it's my first semester and it's always tough, but geez.
On the plus side, I found a good church I think I'm going to start attending, and I'm trying out for the pistol team tomorrow.
Yay College.
I need to go study but I'll keep y'all informed.

Here Baby Cow :)

So here at the big ol'school of learning, they have this cool research facitily a few miles off campus. They offered some of the Animal Science students an oppritunity to feed baby calves. Granted, this is not something that is new to me. I fed baby goats from a bottle and honestly this wasn't much different. But the interesting part is they are researching a specific growth hormone found in pig and sheep food, and seeing if it has the same effect on cows. From what they have informed me, it does. That's the exciting part. They are going to offer this information to the animal nutrition program, where they will create the hormone in cow food, and after many tests and trials begin to sell it to certain research individuals. It was pretty great to realize that I was going to be a part of that one day. Maybe it will even be my idea :)

Y'all have a great weekend :)

Story Time!

Describe yourself in fifteen words exactly.

I chose: "There is nothing so easy to learn as experience, and nothing so hard to apply".
Your turn?

Oh Thank Heaven

So the other day, I requested my parents send me a small care package of some essential items I had forgotten on my journey to the big ol'school of learnin. I anxiously awaited the text message containing the secret words "It has been sent".
That started my frequent trips to the post office box, and unfortunatly Monday was labor day so my package of greatness could not be retreived. Tuesday, I hurried to the post office to show them my little orange sheet, and was given a odd looking box with a return address from my grandparents. Then I remembered they were sending me a care package as well, but I was sad to see that my parent's package had yet to arrive.
I trucked my lone package up the three flights of stairs and was overjoyed to see the hamburger helpers and such awaiting my digestion.
The next day, I practically ran to the post office, and giggled like a school girl as I returned to the counter with a new orange sheet, and was handed a glorious box with a cute "mom and dad" return address. I didn't even stop to talk to my new friends. I quickly husstled my bussle up those three flights of stairs, grabbed my keys and tore open the box, to find it sitting on top, nestled in bubble wrap. My prized possession. The one thing I have been waiting for since it's creation three weeks ago. The parent's infamous pickled okra.



Unfortunatly, there is a limited amount of space in each mason jar, so the supply will not last forever, but merely quinch my craving.... Hint Hint MDR :)

My life is now complete. Y'all have a great day :)

I think I found My Click!

So here at the big ol'school of learnin, they had this open house where you can walk around and see all the organizations you want to join. As I was walking, I skimmed the booths lining the gym, each falling short of my personal tastes.
Walking aimlessly along, hopes dashing with every "cheer club", "music club", or the infamous "water polo team", I saw it. The red streaking banner tucked back in a corner, with two guys lazily passing out flyers to whomever peaked an interest. I stalked over, attempting to mask my enthausiasm, and smiled as the boy handed me a flyer and said "pistol team try-outs are until the 23rd". I'm not going to lie, I giggled.
Apparently here at the big ol' school of learnin, there is a shooting range underneath one of the buildings. This is the location of the pistol team. It is a group of young adults who are handy with a hand gun, who compete in competitions. There is a female group, a coed group, and a male group.
Back when the parents were trying to get us into 4H, I tried out a few times for a rifle team. I would have made it, but you know how those 4H parents get. So I settled for the occasional target practice. I'm pretty sharp with a rifle, and have some experience with handguns, so I'm hoping I make the cut. If I don't, which there is a possiblilty I don't, there is also a skeet team I found shortly after, and a paintballing team that would be a blast to be a part of.
The main idea here is to get involved. There are these organizations called "Flo's" which are Freshman Leadership Organizations. There are Thirteen of them, and each only take about sixty freshman. With 8000 freshman in attendance this year, there is a slight possibilty I wont get into one, so I have the back up plan such as the paintballing team, and if necessary, there is a few volunteering clubs I'm signing up for.

UPDATE: As of right now, the fire that was near campus yesterday was extinguished, and there are no immediate threats. In case of an emergency, I have an evacuation plan and back-up evacuation plan. And my trusty BOB :)
Keep the fires in your prayers. God bless y'all.